life: super powers not included

Category — Fitness

15 Funny Things My Gym Taught Me

Girl at gym
photo by steve & jenna copley

The gym’s a silly place if you really pay attention. Because Wednesday is nothing more than a reminder there are still two more days to the workweek, I thought some musings might make for an entertaining break:

1. Old women have confidence, but sometimes that’s not a good thing. Eighty-year-old fake-n-baked woman at my gym with strange stomach wrinkles who wears a white sports bra and old spandex, I’m looking at you.

2. Leg presses tone your butt. Just when you think you’ve pumped your quads into submission you feel a deep ache in the butt. Yup, the exercise works that bigtime.

3. If you plan on doing reverse crunches, yoga, or other twisty poses, loose shorts aren’t the best idea. Thirtysomething woman who wears short shorts (and, thankfully, underwear) to contort, I’m talking to you.

4. Vitamins, protein shakes, workout clothes, and water double in price when they enter a gym.

5. 7 pm is the worst time to hit the gym if you plan to use cardio equipment, free weights, weight machines, Bosu balls, exercise balls, the exercise mat…

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March 10, 2010   19 Comments

Too Much TV Ups Heart Risks. Or: What Lost Does to Me.

Standing on TVphoto by just luh.

You all had some great insight into yesterday’s discussion about kids’ chronic snacking. If you didn’t get a chance to read it, check it out here and leave your thoughts. I think going forward with the rising rates of obesity, the topic of emotional eating versus eating for hunger is going to continue being a big issue.

A couple people mentioned the fact that kids today are also moving less. That’s a whole other problem, but they go hand in hand, right? Well today I read about a study on our lack of movement. (Nope, this trial didn’t involve kids, but you can see how it could apply to the video game generation, too.)

I understand the irony of what I’m about to say seeing as I’m hooked on five—count ’em: five—TV shows. (If you’re curious, they’re Lost, 24, Fringe, Bones, and Heroes in that order.) Anyhow, turns out twenty- and thirtysomethings who watch more TV are more likely to develop risk factors for heart disease by the time they hit their 40s.

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March 4, 2010   16 Comments

Do You Use a Personal Trainer?

Man doing pull-ups
photo by vu bui
Can a personal trainer get me to do this…more than once?

I used to be the kind of exerciser who bopped from machine to machine until I worked out on every last one. It helped that the gym labeled them. I’d start with No. 1 and pump my way down the line until I hit 30. Done!

Now that I’ve been through physical therapy, I have a set of leg-strengthening exercises to choose from each day. I have a bunch of abs moves I throw into the mix. And, yeah, I work my way down the arms machine line before picking up the free weights and lifting. What I’m trying to say is, over the years I’ve learned more than a few exercises I bust out at the gym.

The Man? Er, not so much.

The Man spent his formative years on one sports team or another, so he’s kind of lost all by himself in the gym. Sure, he’s mastered the treadmill, bike, and elliptical. But when it comes to lifting, he wanders the gym like a little puppy sniffing out a good place to bury its bone. He does the whole machine thing, working his way down the line. Then, the minute he walks out of the weight room he piddles around until I’m ready to head out.

Which is why he’s thinking about getting a personal trainer. Here’s the deal:

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March 2, 2010   18 Comments

I Got A Lot Done and Did Nothing At All. Or Something Like That

Little girl in library
photo by joe thorn

That’s not our new bookcase. I wish. Ours is a sliver of an Ikea one.

Welcome back to the workweek, all.

I had one of those weekends where I simultaneously felt like I got a lot done and did nothing at all. (With a little failure and guilt thrown in for a good measure.) Don’t ask me how that works.

We got a lot done…
While I plugged away at some editing for work, The Man put together a bookcase and two nightstands from Ikea. He’s pretty awesome at deciphering those instructions, which is a talent seeing as they’re drawn by 5-year-old Swedes.

Of course, buying new furniture never stops at construction. So I took a break from work to rearrange our bedroom. Sounds easy, right? Well, it would have been except one of our walls is slanted. (Someone must have thought, “Wouldn’t it be fancy and special if the far wall was tilted?” They were wrong. It’s just annoying.) Since I like symmetry and parallel walls, it took about forever to find a setup where I didn’t feel like all my furniture was askew.

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March 1, 2010   14 Comments

February Gift Guide & Happy Birthday, Sis

Birthday Balloons
photo by scarleth white

Ah, Monday. You seem to sneak up on me like a creepy stalker. Sometimes I wish you’d go away.

But not today. That’s because this Monday is my sister’s birthday. So, Happy Birthday Jill! We won’t be getting together for her special day because she’s about 450 miles from where I live. But I’ll suck it up and eat a birthday dessert in her honor. (Selfless, I am.)

If she did live around here, I would have bought her a ticket to Shutter Island this weekend. The Man and I went on Saturday, and I’m still thinking about the movie. It was packed at 3 in the afternoon, and I was petrified I wouldn’t get to straighten my legs to prevent my knees from killing during the entire movie. (If any of you ever see me at the movies, I’m the rude girl with her legs resting on the seat in front of me. Talk about me behind my back but don’t sit in front of me. Let’s just say an hour with bent knees is pretty much torture.) Lucky for me, no one sat there. Whew, crisis averted.

I won’t go into too much detail here since you really need to see the flick for yourself. I will say Leonardo DiCaprio delivers a killer performance as always. I’ll also mention that I love Martin Scorsese’s work and this film is no exception. And I’ll let you know that there’s a twist to the story that makes you want to watch the movie all over again once the credits roll. That’s all you’re getting. Now go. Go see it.

In honor of my little sis’s birthday, I wanted to give you a few good gift ideas. And, no, none of these are what I got her. (It’s a surprise, folks!)

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February 22, 2010   20 Comments

Here’s Where I Ask You to Diagnose The Man

Arnold S. Pumping Ironphoto by d_vdm
Yup, that’s The Man. I swear.

Happy Hump Day. I think all of these days off have spoiled me. Even though I was off work on Monday for the holiday, I still feel like the week should be rounding up right about now. At least we’re being spared another blizzard.

Instead of a real post, I wanted to use your collective brainpower to diagnose The Man. (Remember what I said about me using the Internet to play doctor? Yeah.) Anyhow, yesterday at the gym he did something goofy while bench pressing. He was fine during the moves. But the minute he stood up, pain in his chest-back-neck-shoulder area started radiating with intensity. He stopped lifting, but has been hurting ever since.

He’s not super specific when it comes to the pain—and I quote: “It’s like when you have a back spasm but into your neck and shoulders”—but this I do know:

  1. It’s not centered around any one area, but it seems to have concentrated mostly in his neck and shoulders after a night’s sleep.
  2. The pain isn’t stabbing.
  3. The pain isn’t dull.
  4. It’s not a heart attack—it feels like a muscle issue.
  5. There’s no swelling, bruising, or other discolorations.
  6. It doesn’t matter if he’s hunched over (shoulders rolled inward) or standing up straight. It hurts no matter what.
  7. Laying down makes it feel better. Sitting or standing up makes it worse.
  8. Sometimes he makes a squished-up face and says he can feel the pain in his Adam’s apple.

Anyone ever experience something like this? He’s taken a few Advil with Not Superhuman orders to repeat that throughout the day. (Um, did I mention I got my MD at Google University?) And yes he’s planning on visiting the doctor, but who knows how soon it’ll be. Most have been closed for a week thanks to Snowmageddon 2010 and are overflowing with patients.

We’ll be back to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow. In the meantime, thanks for the help!

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February 17, 2010   8 Comments

Surviving Snowmageddon 2010

Snow and Pathphoto by ian bc north

Life as we know it is over. That’s what the two anchors on the news keep telling us at least. Ever since snow started falling on Friday afternoon, the poor newscasters assigned to Snowmaggedon coverage have been reporting ’round the clock. I don’t think they’ve even been home since Thursday night. Poor ladies.

Aside from staring out my window and snickering at the poor fools stuck in a snowbank across the street—I’m kidding!—I’ve been doing a whole lotta nothing. Which means I’ve cleaned a lot. The Man and I gave the bathroom a nice wipe down, which made my week because clean things make me happy. Like, really happy.

I made it to the gym between blizzards—when this weekend’s storm was winding down and before it started to snow on Tuesday. I even walked to the gym, a big deal for ol’ gimp here. And you know, I did pretty darn well:

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February 11, 2010   18 Comments

Healthy Link Roundup: Jan. 29

Coffee Headache
photo by migraine chick

Happy Friday!

You know those weeks when time seems to accelerate into warp speed? The ones where you wake up Friday morning and wonder how it can be the weekend so soon? Yeah, this was not one of those weeks for me. Thanks to the yo-yoing weather here, I’ve had some kind of a headache for more than three days. It took all my might not to shut my eyes at my desk this morning. I restrained myself (because that’s how you get fired, folks) but I really, really, really wanted to silence the pounding behind my eyes.

As much as I’d like to say I have wild and crazy plans for the weekend, right about now my mind is daydreaming about taking a nap. Before I pass out take a nap, I thought I’d leave you with some good reads.

Next time you’re trying to remember something really important—say, a speech or a wedding toast—take a break. Researchers found that letting the mind rest (but not sleep) after memorization helped people retain information.

If you’re a runner, check out this article on the Nike iPod sensor and Adidas’ new addition to the running gadget market.

What you eat post-workout makes a difference. A study found that snacking on a low-carb meal after an aerobic workout increased the body’s sensitivity to insulin. Insulin sensitivity is important because insulin resistance can lead to type 2 diabetes.

Maybe it’s just a quirk The Man and I share, but our household is borderline obsessed with expiration dates. (I think we both grew up with great fear of drinking sour milk. Thanks a lot Michael J. Fox in Life With Mikey.) This article explains the difference between “sell by” and “use by” dates plus when you should trash expired food.

It may look a little goofy, but I will definitely be trying this stretch ASAP.

Anyone else a stuffed-up mess thanks to indoor allergens like dust and pet dander? Check out this article for tips on controlling allergens in your home.

Before I drown my headache in a bottle of Excedrin sweat my headache off at the gym, tell me: What are your weekend plans?

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January 29, 2010   5 Comments

Is Barefoot Running Better?

Polka dot girl runningphoto by 802

The first time I heard about barefoot running, I wondered what type of crazy person would trade running shoes for roughed-up heels. It wasn’t just vanity talking (though, OK, my desire for soft, smooth heels did play a role in my skepticism). It was my concern for the general well-being of these runners—especially the city folk.

Bare feet + concrete + shards of glass + a hypodermic needle here and there does not = safe running. Still, over the past year or so I’ve read a lot of firsthand stories saying barefoot running is to exercise what eating locally is to nutrition. Or something like that.

Well, today a study was published that says, “Not so fast. Running sans shoes may be better after all.” In today’s issue of the journal Nature, Harvard researchers who studied runners’ gaits report that 75 percent of people who run in shoes land on their heels first. People who run barefoot strike the ground with the balls of their feet first, which generates less force on impact. According to the researchers, all of this is important because more than 30 percent of runners are injured every year—and those injuries arise thanks to problems in the foot or lower leg.

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January 28, 2010   15 Comments

Morning Workouts. (Or, Those Things Other People Do.)

Paris Metro Adphoto by tomas

This morning I woke up 20 minutes before I needed to. Nope, I’m not becoming a morning person; the towel hook in my bathroom finally unstuck itself. I woke up to an echoing ka-plunk at 6:15 a.m. and, naturally, the first thing I thought was that someone was breaking into my apartment. Of course.

(In my defense, in an apartment building I lived in about a year ago, my neighbors across the hall were beaten with a hammer when their apartment was broken in to. Yes, they were OK. No, we no longer live there. Thus explains my anxiety.)

After checking the place, shaking myself out of early morning grogginess, and realizing our weak little towel hook was to blame, I slid back under the warm covers.

“This would be the perfect time to do some early-morning yoga,” I thought. I always envy those people who can wake up early to exercise and stretch before the day begins. They seem so awake, so centered, so fit.

And then I fell back asleep.

So far, the research hasn’t chosen a side in the workout debate. Some people claim morning exercisers are more likely to stick to their fitness plan. Once the day gets going, we’re more likely to let other tasks, chores, or distractions come between us and our workout. Others say muscles perform better in the late afternoon or early evening. And still others say exercise is best whenever you can fit it in—during the wee hours of the morning (that’s anywhere from 4 to 9 a.m. to me), afternoon, evening, or night.

I’ve never been to the gym before 9 a.m. but I’d like to wager that most people are like me, the squeeze-it-in-after-work-and-before-your-stomach-eats-itself-for-dinner type. I believe this because the gym is packed like a Jonas Brothers concert every night at 5 or 6 p.m.

Still, I have a nagging desire to become this crazy morning person who wakes up at 4 a.m., does some yoga, maybe cardio and strength training every other day, eats breakfast while reading the news, does a little cleaning, and gets ready for the day. All before I’d normally be pressing snooze for the fifth time. (Sigh.)

All right folks, this tired blogger is signing off. It’s time to whip up a quick dinner before I bake some oatmeal breakfast cookies. (Apparently these have escaped my oatmeal boredom.) I cribbed liberally from The Fitnessista’s recipe, though I cool mine in the fridge, roll them into balls, then bake in the oven until they’re crisp. I make a batch that lasts half a week. This week’s add-ins to the oats/milk/protein powder mix: almond butter (of course) with a few chocolate chips, and apples and cinnamon.

Before you go, lemme know: When do you like to exercise? Does the time of day you exercise make a difference to how hard you work out or what type of exercise you do?

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January 27, 2010   17 Comments