Warning: Eating Food May Cause Choking
photo by d sharon pruitt
You guys rock. No, really. I’ve been reading all of the awesome comments you’ve left this week and it makes me so happy. There: Another thing that makes me happy. Add that to yesterday’s list.
Anyhow, just thought you should know.
This week has been dragging along as always—I think I have a chronic case of the Wednesdays—and despite our better judgment The Man and I put off grocery shopping for yet another day. Well, really, we made him put off grocery shopping since I don’t go. Yeah, he’s swell. So it looks like another painfully boring peanut butter and jelly sandwich for me today. (That’s only fun in a nostalgic kind of way when you don’t eat them for a week straight. Trust me.)
So I want to preface this post by telling you that I love kids. I think they’re great. I think they’re cute, especially when they say crazy things like, “You have really yellow teeth.” (Not that my sister did that or anything when she was three.) I have three insanely adorable nephews who make me laugh and smile every time I see them.
But…
As much as parents would like to bubble wrap their little bundles of joy, it ain’t gonna happen. They’re going to fall and scrape their knees. They’ll eat something disgusting and live to see another day. They’ll stick Cheerios up their nose and need a trip to the doctor. (Not that I put Cheerios up my sister’s nose when she was three.)
That’s why I had to laugh when I read that a group of pediatricians, writing in the March issue of the journal Pediatrics, want to redesign cylindrical or round foods and candies so they’re not choking hazards to children. Goodbye hot dogs, hello mystery meat patties. See ya, lollipops. Hello flat slabs of hard sugar.
photo by roboppy
OK, so here’s what two of them say: “Any food that has a cylindrical or round shape poses a risk.” And “people should know that grapes are a choking hazard for a certain-age child, that hot dogs are of risk.” They also point fingers at peanuts, peanut butter, and hard candy. They call for the government to create a mandatory system of labeling foods choking hazards and for a redesign of the worst offenders.
Now, I’m not saying that choking isn’t a risk for little kids. I think it’s serious. (Don’t believe me? The report says the most common cause of death in kids under age 5 is choking.) But is turning a hot dog into Spam really the answer? For starters, what parent doesn’t cut their 1-year-old’s hot dog? And isn’t the same person who gives little tykes hard candies the one who’s not going to care about the Lego’s he’s eating between meals?
I also wonder what a warning will do. These days, we’re so inundated with warnings it’s hard to really pay attention. Our coffee cup reminds us that coffee is hot. Our aspirin bottle warns us not to take the med if we’re allergic to aspirin. And baby strollers remind parents to remove their children before storing. So, really, what will another caution accomplish? I can see it now: Warning! Hot dogs may cause choking. Not suitable for consumption by minors.
(If you’re up for a laugh or eye roll, check out this list of stupid warning labeles. A couple of my favorites? “Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly,” on a child’s Superman costume. And “Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants,” on a wristwatch package.)
photo by d sharon pruitt
Is it crazy to think that parents can handle this? They can cut food smaller. They can skip small hard candies until a child’s old enough. Goodness, they’re asked to worry about a gazillion other things, like making sure a baby sleeps just right to avoid sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) or preventing kids from eating garbage or tar or dog poop or whatever other crazy things they find. Doesn’t that make them capable enough to know small children can’t handle objects the exact size and shape of their throat?
All of that being said, I’m not a mom. I don’t know how I’d feel if I had a mini superhuman right here. Maybe I’d want some Gobstopper package to remind me that the candy isn’t suitable for children still nursing.
What are your thoughts? Moms and dads, I’d especially like to hear from you.
13 comments
I absolutely agree that parents can handle this. Just cut the food and watch your kid! It’s not like I would ever give a small child grapes without watching them…I really don’t think food labels are going to do much good either. It’s called commonsense, which I’m hoping at least some Americans still have!
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That is CRAZY!!! I don’t have kids so I don’t want to say that this isn’t a serious issue but really?! I mean can’t our government focus on more important issues?
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Oh my Lord – too true…what ever happened to kids rolling around in the dirt and climbing trees?? Seriously – we did all that stuff when we were young – kids are so “protected” nowadays…
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Seriously? This is so funny. I’m fairly certain we cannot babyproof the entire world, including the grocery store! Parents need to be responsible for their own kids. Considering that Maya never choked on anything (thank God) and I am not the most diligent parent, I think that anybody who pays even the slightest bit of attention to what their kids are eating should be fine. Common sense people!
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Our daughter got her first real bloody nose this week after taking an inadvertant knee to the mush during a particularly wild play date. We gave her a few dabs of the kleenex to stop it and she ran right back to playing hard and jumping off the furniture. Kids are amazingly tough and will bounce back quickly if parents don’t overreact to the situation and act like they’re going to die after every scratch. Kids react to parents and will mirror their level of panic/calm. Our daughter burned her hand once grabbing a pan on the stovetop. She didn’t like it one bit but now when she sees the stovetop she says “Hot! Be careful!” Something bad can always be turned into a positive learning experience.
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I guess I don’t really see it as funny, as I had a one year old choke on a Cheerio and had to do the Heimlich manuever on her. I don’t know that warning labels will help, but raising awareness is always a good idea.
By the way, I never gave another child of mine Cheerios until they were about five!
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Tracey Reply:
February 25th, 2010 at 5:22 pm
Diane, thank you so much for sharing. As I mentioned, I’m not a parent so I don’t come at this with experience at all. That’s scary, and I hope you don’t think I’m making fun of choking. As I said, it’s really serious. I’m just not sure putting a label on all foods is going to do much.
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Even though I religiously cut up my kids hot dogs and grapes, all the little buggers have still found ways to injure themselves. I think it’s a rite of childhood. You do your best as a parent yet still make sure your CPR certification is up to date:)
And my favorite warning ever was on my Seasonal Affective Disorder “Happy Light” (a big light box, basically). It said “Not for use on genitals. Ummm… was that really a problem??
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“And isn’t the same person who gives little tykes hard candies the one who’s not going to care about the Lego’s he’s eating between meals?” Precisely. Love you.
I think the more we frighten the children, the worse off we’ll be. Not everything will kill them. I even ate a dime when I was younger. Money hungry at such a young age…
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i LOVE lists of stupid warning labels. i forget the site that has a TON of them, so funny. um, i think generations of us have made it this far without choking on every cylindrical food, i’m pretty sure parents can manage cutting up food for their youngins
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Its amazing we made it into adulthood. =) How did you get your man to go to the grocery store for you guys? You are a lucky woman!
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I am not a mom either but I’m a wicked-cool aunt! I’m also a wicked-cool marketer and am always on the hunt for bad marketing and messaging so I LOVE THIS ARTICLE!
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With all due respect for concerned pediatricians everywhere, this is just silly. Hot dogs are certainly not the only food that can choke a child (or an adult, for that matter). Almost anything can, cylindrical, round or otherwise, if it’s too large to swallow properly and hasn’t been chewed. You’re right that most parents are careful about how they feed their little ones, cutting meat into appropriately small chunks, etc. So I think if a “warning” is necessary, then it should remind parents to watch their kids, encourage them to take smaller bites and chew everything well before attempting to swallow. Common sense, right? Goodness. Hot dogs. Another thing to panic over…
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