Hindering Healthy Eating
photo here
That, my friends, is cheeze. With a z.
There’s something I want to tackle today, and it mostly applies to women with husbands, though all the single ladies can take this as a warning of impending doom.
How’s that for a cheery, upbeat lead?
I’ll just go on and say it: Getting married makes you eat like crap.
Or, at least, makes you eat worse than you ever used to before you got hitched. It’s scientifically proven, which is saying something. I’m not implying that marriage makes you eat like a man, all burgers and beers and frozen meals that include orange cheeze (in which the z indicates its obscure origins and characteristically un-cheese-like qualities). I am implying—no, stating—that getting married makes you eat stuff you may not have eaten before. Because someone bought it. Or someone brought it home. I won’t mention any names, but it’s usually someone known as The Man.
(Brief pause … the same can be said of men who eat healthy and marry junk food lovin’ women. I don’t have experience with that, but I’m 99.9 percent positive it happens. So I’m not picking on men in general. I’m just more experienced with being married to a guy, you know?)
That’s been the case around here for the past few weeks because I’m at the mercy of The Man’s grocery trips. (And yes I appreciate that he does the shopping and spares my knees and does just about everything else around here. Disclaimer, disclaimer, disclaimer.) But I’ll tell you what: There’s been a sort of chip and bread overload the likes of which this body has never seen.
All of this backstory leads to one good question: How do you eat healthy when your husband is—oh, how do you say it?—a meat and potatoes kinda guy? (And when I say meat and potatoes I mean hamburgers and fries, of course.)
Here’s what you do:
1. Do the grocery shopping. This is an obvious answer for anyone with two legs that happen to work. (Hear that, knees? Other people’s legs actually move without pain. Just sayin’.)
2. Make a grocery list. It’s a good way to take the focus off the Hostess Cupcakes that happen to be on sale and happen to be on an aisle end cap, staring your husband in the face. With a list in hand, he’ll be better able to resist the magnetic pull of the discount aisle and march along to fruits and veggies. It helps if your grocery list says in all caps DO NOT BUY JUNK OR ELSE. No, it’s not necessary to explain what the OR ELSE is. He’ll get the idea.
3. Cook separate meals. This idea doesn’t thrill me, and here’s why: When you make two separate meals you’re not encouraging one another to eat healthy. Sure, The Man can eat a cheeze dog and barbecue potato chips while I munch on a salad, but consistently doing that isn’t any good for him. Besides, it just feels more like a family dinner when the family is actually eating the same dinner.
4. When all else fails, do one of those sit-down serious talks you see on Oprah or Supernanny. I had “The Talk” over the weekend with The Man, and he’s agreed to support my healthy eating. (I’d like to note that The Man and I were at a chain restaurant on our way home from his sister’s and we were munching on jalapeno and cheese poppers during this conversation. Yes, I see the irony.)
There you have it: Simple steps for getting your husband on board with your healthy eating goals. 1. Do it yourself. 2. Give good instructions. 3. Do your own thing. 4. Beg and plead—and lay on the guilt.
By the way, there’s still time to enter my Totally Awesome Beauty Package Contest. Woo hoo. So head here and enter if you’re a girl and want to add 11 beauty products to your arsenal. Or if you’re a guy (thanks, Armbar) and want to regift.
Do any of you have a spouse who’s, um, less than enthusiastic about healthy eating? What do you do? If you fly solo, do a girl’s or guy’s eating habits determine whether he gets a second date?
30 comments
Not really. I’m single, and I went out the other day to this diner-type restaurant with two of my new guy friends. I was considering ordering a burger because both of them were, but I ordered a salad instead. They teased me for a while, saying I was such a girl, but they both sort of accepted it in the end. To be honest I wouldn’t have been able to eat a burger without being consumed in guilt. I don’t think I would have been able to eat a burger at all. :S
Wei-Wei
[Reply]
What’s funny is that Keith is such a healthy eater that I definitely eat better now than when I was single! Thanks for all your kind words about my arm too….I appreciate it more than my one good hand can type.
[Reply]
My husband tries to be a healthy eater especially since his father, the junk food king, was dethroned by a quadruple bypass last year. That being said, he is somewhat spotty in his healthy eating. For example after watching Food Inc. he was all up in my grill, as the young ‘uns say, about buying grass fed local meat but then would sit there eating his grass fed bison burger and with Doritos, huh? Processed cheese anyone? Or he will eat my Kashi cereal with about a pound of sugar on it. He does get some points for trying though despite the occasional Wendy’s visit.
[Reply]
I just read a study this morning that purported women eat less when they are around guys, but I’m assuming the study was referring to women in the dating phase. I don’t really alter my eating habits around who I’m with, but I’m not married yet either, so we’ll see!
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 9:23 am
Ah, yes. I could see that–women restricting a bit when they’re dating.
[Reply]
Hilarious and so friggin true. It’s made me eat like crap but my hubs is the healthiest, obnoxious, lol. Even when he eats junk once in a blue moon nothing ever shows on him.
I think I ate less when I was dating because I was focused on other things, like what a boyfriend was doing at the time. Now I’m comfy and happy and thinking about my next meal, ha.
[Reply]
Yes! There is definitely that comfort period. Even with dating couples – a friend of mine started off all “goo-goo” with the guy and dressing up, going out, etc….but almost a year into the relationship – when they were “used” to eachother – they spent more time inside on a Friday night with nachos and sweats. The Honeymoon phase ends.
And, seriously, you write so well – I only wish to have that talent. You should be writing for publications – magazines or online or something…and when you get a gig – remember me and get me one too !!
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 5:23 pm
Thanks for the compliment. Are you sure you’re not my mom? Did she hijack your info and post this?
[Reply]
we eat the same….means Ihave to buy double of everything good
[Reply]
My hubby is 6′8″ and has a muscular build (I know. lucky me) so he can eat a lot – I mean a lot- of things that I could never even think of eating. I’m totally jealous sometimes and sometimes I can’t help myself because what he’s eating looks so dang good! I’m trying to learn to balance this with extra exercise. SUX!
[Reply]
YES! Before I got married I never ate tortilla chips smothered with melted cheese, ice cream right before I went to bed, or triple cheeseburgers! Fortunately I do the cooking. I can see where if you aren’t able to grocery shop this would be hard. I vote for the begging/compromise option! I’ll eat a bit of your bad stuff if you eat a lot of my good stuff.
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 5:22 pm
Compromise is a good idea. I was leaning toward my total dictatorship, but I guess I can compromise…
[Reply]
Oh boy..my husband and I totally deal with this. Each night, I make us a meal and I have to find a way to load calories on his and keep mine more fit. THEN he dives into his endless supply of chips and salsa and chocolate covered pretzels within an hour after eating. It drives me bonkers to have all the temptations! I have to give him a very strict list when he grocery shops or who knows what we’d end up
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 5:21 pm
The Man snacks after dinner, too. I try to eat a fruit for dessert but of course when he breaks out the cookies I’m powerless.
[Reply]
So true. I am in search of that elusive male creature who is as excited about vegetables as I am. Uh, yeah, good luck with that. (BTW, I am loving the “Raw Food, Real World” recipe book—adorable couple who went raw together and now run a restaurant in NYC. Sweet. Persuasive even : )
[Reply]
I would have had very few (if any) relationships in my life if I only went out with men who ate like I did. I’ve been a vegetarian for as long and I can remember, and I’ve never met a man who didn’t love his meat. I’m not saying veggie men don’t exist, I’ve just never come across them. Now my diet is even more selective and I guess you could say healthier, and a lot of people (especially men) have an aversion to what they would consider health food. I’m not married, so I don’t have to worry about family dinners or shared groceries at this point. I really just do my own thing and don’t comment on what the guy is eating. I’m sure I’ll have the same problem as you down the line, though.
[Reply]
ive posted about this before alot but basically over the past 12 yrs i took my chubby chicago meat and potatoes guy to 95% a raw vegan. he eats this way w/ me and when he’s on biz, he eats what is served…but actually hates that kind of food now!
[Reply]
As much as I didn’t want to, I gave up and I now make two separate meals. For a while I was making 3 meals because Maya wouldn’t eat what Ali ate and I couldn’t eat what either of them ate but now she just deals with it. So 2 is really quite an improvement!
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 5:16 pm
You got paid for making those three separate meals, right?
[Reply]
My bf and I don’t eat the same foods but we generally both like to eat healthy things, so there isn’t too much of a problem.
Usually if I cook it, he eats it.
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 5:15 pm
Ah yes, being the family cook does help. Most men would rather eat what you cook than make their own junk food fest.
[Reply]
I’m lucky in that my husband is pretty into healthy eating, or – more accurately – eating less processed food. He still has his vices but he usually indulges them as an evening snack rather than a meal.
Your writing always makes me smile, by the way. You’re so witty!
[Reply]
Tracey Reply:
August 5th, 2010 at 5:14 pm
Thanks, that’s too sweet of you!
[Reply]
I am lucky that my boyfriend loves eating healthy food, so he eats whatever I make him. ; )
[Reply]
I like this post. Interesting and I like these ideas – it crops up in magazines occasionally and its interesting to see the struggles of many…it is the concept of comfort I think. Just comforting.
[Reply]
My husband and I have had so many disagreements about junk food that we pretty much go the separate meals route. He’s totally down with eating whatever I cook (bless his unpicky heart) but then he’ll bring home 2 tubs of ice cream, a bag of chips and 5 lbs of gummy bears. Of which he’ll take one bite of each and leave the rest to torture me. I think it’s time to take your cue and have The Talk.
[Reply]
Oh my gosh, we’re married to the same guy! Lol. Jk. I just completely relate! I used to be SO super healthy and then I got married and now I don’t know what I’m eating. Ugh! I’m actually beginning the process of turning things around… you know, taking back the kitchen. And — yes — it involves me going grocery shopping with my husband to give him lessons. Ha, ha.
[Reply]
I am a single girl and I will say that a guys table manners will and have determined it they’ll be getting a second date! I’m picky that way. Aaaaannnd no wonder I’m single!
[Reply]
My husband eats a bunch of crap when I’m not around. Fortunately, when I am around, he’ll eat what I make. But that means that I always have to do the grocery shopping and make the food to have him eat healthy. It’s worth it, I guess.
[Reply]
Boy do I agree with that. In fact, my eating habits started to change a bit when my husband and I first start dating. He has 3 brothers and every time I went to eat at his house his mom would have a table full of food that looked like a buffet. The options were endless! I never truly thought about food that way until I met him. But it really is about finding balance and just trying to get you and him on the same eating plan.
[Reply]
Leave a Comment